Kentucky

So, I’ve been going through some really tough stuff the last few days. And it's causing me to really miss home, and miss my friends and family there. I miss things that I never thought I would miss. Or, wouldn’t have expected to miss this much.

I miss marching band. I knew I would miss marching band, I did. But every Saturday when I see people post about their competition and how good they did or didn’t do, I find myself really missing it. I really miss the performance aspect of it. There’s something about getting in front of a crowd and playing something that you’ve worked really hard on, and getting to hear them cheer for you. It’s an adrenaline rush, for sure. I miss the way I felt whenever the crowd cheered when we did something cool. I miss the marimba that I played, and I don’t even care if that sounds weird. I miss the bus rides, when we would all hang out and just spend time together talking, laughing, and being silly. I miss the prayer that Mr. Morrison would say before we went out and performed. Most of all, though, I miss playing music on such a regular basis. I miss the learning process, and how you’re never good enough to just stop working on a particular part of the music. I even miss the frustrations that came with learning music, because the reward when I finally figured out a part was so great. I miss my marching band family a lot.

I miss Mitch and Kaitlin…I miss all of our silly times. I miss doing stupid things, and them laughing at me for it. I knew they were never really laughing at me out of meanness, but because they thought I was being funny. I miss Mitch’s peeled banana colored hair, and how soft it is. I miss hugging Kaitlin, because she couldn’t stand it. I miss having Mrs. Laughter and Mr. Moore with Kaitlin. I miss lunch time and how much we all laughed. I miss whenever Kaitlin would make me laugh so hard that my legs would give out, because she’s just that funny. I miss free days in band, just sitting with the two of them and being silly. I miss them so much it makes me wanna cry sometimes. It’s those times that I’m grateful for our group messages, and being able to talk to both of them at the same time.

I miss GADS. The donuts in Lubbock aren’t even close to matching up, even though there’s a Krispy Kreme here. GADS > all other donuts in the world. I really miss “Donuts after Dark” with Taylor…and everyone else. GADS is definitely the best in the middle of the night.

I miss trees. Especially right now, when the leaves are starting to change. I miss being able to look at all of them as they changed and marveling at God’s complexity. I miss green in general. Lubbock doesn’t have very much of that. And, yes, there is a certain beauty of it all, because there is so much sky, and the vastness is incredible. But, I miss my KY and how green everything is.

Ok, confession time…I sometimes miss how humid Kentucky can be. Texas is so dry, which isn’t always a bad thing, but I’m seriously thirsty all the time. Also, I’m quickly developing a chap stick addiction like nobody’s business. My lips, skin, mouth, scalp, hands and feet are all so so so dry right now. I constantly feel like I need lotion. Ok, that’s all I have to say about missing humidity.

I miss Alvaton. I miss listening to Richard Perry speak on Wednesdays. I miss his lessons, and how he always tells a story and then connects it to something spiritual. He’s so relatable. I miss Randy Well’s preaching and how I always learn so much when I listen to him. I miss Ryan and Melinda. SOOO much. I always knew they were two of the biggest influences and supporters in my life, but now more than ever I realize how much they’ve meant to me over the last four years. I miss Elsie. If I talk more about that I’ll cry or something. But I do miss that girl. So much. I miss Abby, and our Team Cray good times, our Kroger runs and drunk guys giving us advice on which socks to buy. All I have to say is: Talaypot FOREVER. I miss Angel Ann, and how she was such a good listener, and how talking things out with her could always make me feel better. I miss Sydney, and I miss sitting by her every Wednesday night. Her smile always brightens my day. I miss Justin, Arkadiy, Ruslan, Andrew and Ethan and the languages and different words they all made up. I miss Taylor and Taylor (or Morgan) and how we never knew who was getting talked to. I miss so much about church, and youth group, and everything else, that I could do a whole blog post on that by itself. (Hey, I just wanna throw in here that if you read this, and you wanna pray for my youth group and all the people in it that would be awesome and really helpful!)

I miss my dad. The distance between Texas and Kentucky has made us closer, so I’m anxious to see him in person and hang out.

I miss my little brother. I  miss how much I would get on his nerves by trying to talk to him when he was playing video games, but then as soon as I started watching something on Netflix or doing something else, he wanted to talk. That kid is crazy. I miss being silly with him, and hanging out. Going to Wal Mart, or just going for a drive. I just miss my little brother, and it’s weird that he’s not so little anymore.

I miss my momma. A lot. Notice how that’s bold, underlined, and italicized? That’s because my momma is one of my best friends in the whole world, and I miss being around her all the time. I miss running errands with her. That was always our time together, since Gabe never wanted to go. It wasn’t like we ever did anything special during those times, but there was just something really enjoyable about going out and about with my momma, getting to just talk and relax. I’ve especially missed her since all of the fall tv shows have come out. I miss spending weeknights watching Dancing With The Stars, and The X Factor with her. I miss talking about who we liked and didn’t like, criticizing and complementing how each performance was. I mostly just miss talking to her. Sitting down and having a conversation with her about what was going on in life, my past, her past, the future. Everything.

I guess homesickness is setting in, and it’s been hard for me to deal with. I’m just glad that we’ll be in Kentucky in a couple weeks, and I’ll get to see my mom! Yay! I love Kentucky, and it’s my home. The place of my childhood, and, for now, the place that holds my heart. I love it, I love its people. I’m gonna cry if I write more. But I just wanted to share some of my homesickness, and talk about how much I miss everything.